Disable the Enable

I was inspired to write this poem to all the enablers of the world who think they are doing

right by God by enabling all those who have addictions whether it be to substances, shopping, working, victimhood, overthinking, attention seeking and so on and so forth. Some even get addicted to drama - the extreme highs and the extreme lows. Addiction to toxic relationships are a thing as well. When things are good they are great but when they are not, you are depressed waiting for the next time things turn good again hoping the situation or person will change. In essence, what you are saying to these people is I don't think you are powerful enough to change and who am I if I release the need to try to control outcomes! And who am I if I give up my enabler role? Who will love me and why am I so afraid to lose love? Manipulation is viewed as a dirty word but we become manipulative when we give away our power and try to get our needs met in an unhealthy manner. When you have poor personal boundaries you are giving your energy over to someone else because you need their approval. We are funny humans. Instead of focusing on self-approval, you rely on that dopamine rush when someone says something nice to you. Just to let you know that 'drive by saviours' are out of fashion! Find a new trend - one that is more in alignment with who you truly are and if you don't know, step back and go inward. There are so many distractions keeping us from our awareness and enabling is definitely one of the big ones! Enablers create a toxic environment for the whole herd!

NEWS FLASH -YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE TO CHANGE OR REFORM ANYONE ELSE, ONLY YOURSELF! You change yourself to live in harmony with your soul and with the divine or God. You will help more people living your life this way than being an enabler. You will give people hope and inspiration.

Consider yourself an energy banker and you are constantly making investments. Are you getting a good return on your investment? Are you going to finance an idea that doesn't pay back a positive return? Just so you know, addictions are a very expensive energetic habit never mind what they do to your physical health. And if you are enabling, you are depleting your own energy in the process. There is a reason why lifeguards do not jump in the water with a drowning person; they throw them a life raft because if they don't, they may both drown. That is the same with addiction and toxic relationships. Set boundaries and offer compassion and resources and then step back. And for the love of God, don't let your guilt or another person's guilt slither into your psyche or energy field! Families are really great at trying to manipulate you into some toxic belief system that families stick together no matter what and that includes enabling....UNPLUG! You know your true power source comes from living an authentic life and cleaning up your side of the street. Garbage day is not just once every two weeks but anytime you decide it to be.

When I was growing up

You were always drunk

I didn’t have the courage

To say your liquor stunk

I deeply craved your love

A Father who’d protect

Instead I got your shame

That you would deflect

It haunted me for years

I was nothing but a shell

The curse of sabotage

I couldn’t shake the spell

You would often call

In a drunken stupor

I’d talk to you for hours

I was a little trooper

I now need you to know

My soul I’m going to bear

Your foolish drunken self

Is no longer welcome here

I’m not a Rehab Centre

Which is what you need

Watching you self-destruct

My growth it will impede

I may be flesh and blood

Your saviour I am not

Revise your coping skills

That keeps you so distraught

Heal all that pain

That you’re hiding from

I know it’s probably easier

To drink until you’re numb

I find it hard to connect

On this one-way street

You always talk in circles

It’s really hard to meet

You are welcome back

When sobriety is your friend

Enabling is a vice

To you I won’t extend

Integrity is a priceless gift

I’m offering to you

A rare form of medicine

Prescribed only by a few

-heather may